How do I make decisions?
Everyone has different ways to make decisions. Well, in my case, I just go with my gut feeling. I see what feels right to me, and ask myself that can I own and can stand by whatever the outcomes are? So I try to do those things through which I can say that yes, it seems right to me and I did this. On the other hand, I try to stay away from the decision where I don’t even know why I did this because I don’t want to be in the position where I don’t know the reason behind my decision. So that’s why I’ve to make sure that whatever decision I’m making, it’s something that I can stand by and I can own it. And it makes decision-making easy for me as I don’t owe anyone an explanation for my own decisions.
For example, if I’m going to buy something, I’ll ask these 4 questions to myself:
- Can I afford it?
- Do I need this thing?
- If I don’t buy this thing, can I live without it?
- Does it harm someone in any possible way?
Thus, this will keep you straight inline and converts the hard decision-making process into a more facile one.
Is it Important to Understand Yourself?
Here is the thing, when you understand yourself, then, it’s not difficult to understand others. I think I’m going to move forward with knowing that people’s actions towards me have nothing to do with me. It has everything to do with them, who they are, what they believe in and what’s going on with them in their minds. So there is no point for me to worry about that, to take offence to that or to feel guilty about it.
Just like that, all my actions have everything to do with me. There are many points in life where we take the actions of other people towards us as like I’ve done something that’s why he/she is doing this with me, I’ve said something that’s why that person treats me like this. I feel like we don’t realize that we address the notions inside us and that’s why our actions end up being questionable and ridiculous.
I think to understand the relationships, it’s important to know that not every relationship is the same. Each relationship is built on different dynamics and we’ve to move with them, accordingly. You’ll be too self-centred if you take each relationship in the same way. You need to understand that every human being that you’re interacting with is different, totally different. Every person needs a different level of energy from you. And your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.
Even if you’re sitting with your family, you need to be aware that shall I discuss this particular thing with my this family member or not (it can be anything). It’s not because you’re being sly or you’re being calculated. You must know that this thing works there and it doesn’t work here. And that’s how you make relationships work by understanding the dynamics and what works for that dynamic. You’re meant to be surrounded by those people that truly understand you and would be there for you through any time of your life. Those who support you and stand by you. That’s very important.
Privacy ~ A Must Have
Privacy is really important for me to function normally. To be able to tell the two apart that this is my professional life and this is my personal life. And the way I’m in my professional life is very different from the way I’m in my personal life. I need to maintain my sanity by knowing that my personal life has to remain private. There’s no competition because nobody can be me.
I’m not a person who is comfortable with sharing everything with everyone. I want to spin like that. I have always been the kind who wouldn’t easily open up to people. Because staying private and staying quiet is my strength. Many times we’re put in tough spots where we have to be like, ok do I get offended here, do I respond to this or do I ignore this? But I think that is the moment where you’ve to decide for yourself that no this is personal to me and I would like to keep this to myself. And I appreciate people who respect that. I think that people need to create boundaries for themselves for a peaceful life.
Let’s Never Stop the Process of Self-Growth
So here in my case, I like being myself, I love being myself, I like spending time with myself. I like researching things that seem interesting to me and for all of that I need time. I need time by myself. I like sitting and reflecting upon just everything. And this keeps the urge to develop myself always running wild in me.
Moreover, there are things that you keep discovering about yourself with the time that helps you to grow. You can never put yourself in a box and say this is me. Remember, that change is constant and if you don’t evolve with that change you’ll be stagnant. I think the most common problem in all of us is “arrested development.” We come at a certain point and stop developing ourselves. We think that this is the point where I’ve to reach and now I’m here so, I’m complete. No. This is wrong. You must develop yourself and learn a variety of things every single day. Personal development is like, some people want it to happen, some people wish it would happen, others make it happen. And remember, you’ll never make it if you care what others think. So keep growing and be happy!
“Chaos” in Detail
Chaos is an interesting phenomenon. Rather, a particular flow of energy. With the lack of particularity in its manifestation and a sense of uncertainty at its core, it’s something that always remains unique and ever-evolving. Something that, the algorithms cannot predict and forecasts cannot see. Something that power structures do not and cannot account for. It’s something transcendent in its nature, destructive when it’s formless and unstoppable when it’s harnessed. It’s the zenith of all energy.
Grasping the Concept of Life
Life is unpredictable. You never know what you’re going to get. It gives you the humbling experience, to say the least where we all have to learn to accept it. On the flip side, God sometimes sent a software update which makes us feel like we’ll come out of it lighter on our feet with our faith stronger than before, meticulously garnished with a dollop of patience.
I don’t think we would have stopped if the universe hadn’t bought difficulties for us. There are times in life when our loyal great friend chaos took some time off. And we begin to make friends with peace, with ourself and a pace which used to make us comfortable. Here’s to new friendships, learnings and gratitude. In some cases, you need terrible things to occur - to inspire you to change and develop.
Life isn't reasonable. It never was, it isn't currently and it won't ever be. Don’t fall into the trap, the entitlement trap, of feeling like you’re a victim. You’re not. The universe is filled with the right and wrong, and that distinction is not hard to make. It's during your tough times, that your actual power will uncover itself.
Learn to Respect Other’s Opinions
Before you contend with somebody, ask yourself, is that individual even intellectually mature enough to grasp the idea of alternate points of view? Because if not, there’s absolutely no point.
Second, know that it’s possible to coexist in a space with someone without agreeing with them. We’re constantly searching for certainty in the world, but sometimes it just isn’t there. Learning to live in this grey area is important. Rather than trying to change people’s minds, aim to affect their beliefs through your actions. You can still love them, even if there’s one area in which you wish they’d rethink.
The other thing I've seen is exactly how much individuals care about their stance and how personally attacked they feel if you question it. As someone whose favourite word is ‘why?’, this has caused me more than a few problems. It happens in my personal life, too.
Let’s Act and Respect others’ Opinions and Perspectives
- Begin with an open mind. Be happy to get opposing thoughts and find out the worldview of people you don’t agree with.
- Search for a shared view or look for common ground. Every human being is valuable, regardless of their opinions or worldview. Figure out how to see everybody with affection, and afterwards search for ways you two can interface on a more profound level.
- Listen intently. With the ascent of internet-based life, listening has nearly become an under-appreciated skill. Furthermore, it's significantly harder to tune in face to face. We hear people speaking, but are we listening? Or are we just thinking about what we will say next? Stop thinking about your argument either you agree or not instead focus on what the other person is saying. Pay attention to their emotions and their tone.
- Look for comprehension and seek understanding. Instead of questioning the validity of the other person’s opinions or beliefs, ask questions and be curious.
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